Shyness is common and natural in young children. When shy behaviour starts to negatively affect a child’s ability to make friends or participate in social activities it could be a sign of social anxiety. Learn the do’s and don’ts for helping your child with social anxiety.
Recognising Social Anxiety in Young Children
If you’re not sure whether your child is experiencing social anxiety or just being shy, there are indicators to look for, including:
- Has challenges making new friends
- Avoids joining group activities and seems to prefer doing most things alone
- Seems to strongly dislike having attention placed on them
- Withdraws in group settings and doesn’t ‘speak up’
In some cases, these can just be indicators of a child feeling shy, particularly if your young child displays these behaviours in a new environment.
If your child has been consistently appearing uncomfortable in a social group or environment that isn’t new to them, it might be an indicator of social anxiety.
What Can You Do to Help Your Child with Social Anxiety?
As a parent, there are many ways you can help your child feel more comfortable in social situations:
- Give your child gentle encouragement to participate in social settings
- Don’t try to force them to join in if they don’t want to
- Keep trying – avoiding social settings can make things worse
- Give your child positive feedback when they face a fear and do something that you know is challenging for them
- Avoid ‘making them wrong’ about their feelings of fear or anxiety
- Let your child speak for themself when asked questions and don’t speak on their behalf if they stay silent
- Avoid telling people your child is shy in the child’s presence – this further embeds the behaviour as they can start to identify themselves with that label
If you’re concerned about your child’s anxiousness in social settings, speak to your Educator or family doctor for support.
Hosting a Play Date
If you have concerns about your child’s social skills, a good way to help them develop their ability to form positive relationships with their peers is to host a play date with children from daycare, school or within your social circles.
Tips for a good play date:
If your child has displayed signs of shyness or social anxiety it can help to invite just one or two friends.
Prepare some activities that you think all the children will enjoy and that your child will feel confident with.
Depending on your child’s age and interests this could include:
- musical instruments
- creative activities such as drawing or painting
- recycled materials for making things
- props for imaginative play
- toys such as Lego or other building blocks