Child Development: Helping Children Build Resilience
In this article we’ll share tips on helping children build resilience and outline why it matters.
Resilience is the ability to deal with difficulties and bounce back from challenges, trauma or adversity.
It’s important when we think about our own resilience or that of our family members, that we don’t expect an immediate bounce back.
Depending on all sorts of factors, it will take more time to recover from certain events or circumstances than others.
Benefits of Resilience
When children have developed resilience they are able to recover faster from difficult life events. This ability to overcome problems is self-affirming.
When a child does bounce back from difficulty this builds their confidence for dealing with setbacks in the future.
Resilient children often experience better physical and mental health.
They are also more likely to deal with problems that arise, in healthy and constructive ways that support growth.
Helping Children Build Resilience
You can do the following to help your child build resilience:
- Help them to understand and manage their emotions through acknowledging and accepting their feelings.
- Teach your child self-compassion to be kind to themselves when things don’t go well for them.
- Allow your child to ‘fail forward’. Help them learn that trying is more important than ‘succeeding’ and that we all improve at things through trial and error.
- Try to let your child solve their own problems wherever possible rather than jumping in to fix things or attempting to make things better for them. Support them in finding their own solutions.
- Encourage your child to try again if something doesn’t work out the way they wanted or planned.
- Create a ritual or habit out of noticing and appreciating things that go well, perhaps as part of the dinner time or bedtime routine.
Keys to Resilience in Life
The following are considered ‘protective factors’ in developing resilience throughout life:
Social Networks: Having people in our lives to turn to for support during troubling times increases our ability to bounce back
Realistic Planning: The ability to create achievable goals that draw on our greatest strengths builds our confidence and competence
Self-Esteem: A positive view of self helps us avoid feelings of hopelessness in the face of challenging situations
Coping Skills: The ability to problem solve helps us feel empowered as we manage our way through difficult times
Communication Skills: The ability to clearly articulate our situation helps us seek support, tap into resources and take constructive action
Emotional Regulation: Being able to manage our emotions helps us to focus as we overcome difficulties
We hope these tips will help you support you and your child in developing resilience.